We are back together after a week of the hubby traveling for work. Washington DC is his second home...and he spent yesterday at the US State Dept. (I asked him if he talked to anyone who may have had their hand on our dossier and thank them for it). He said, no, he wasn't in that department but he did get to share God's story with a couple of people while he was there and they know we are awaiting a special treasure from Ethiopia.
It was a long week nonetheless. I went to our Thursday night class at church last night, and I spewed from the moment I walked in the door. I apologized....a lack of adult conversation tends to make me talk a blue streak! But it has been an incredibly wonderful week.
This week I also spent time one on one with my son like never before. Just the two of us. Connecting in a new way; in a way that we hadn't in the past. It was phenomenal. I am so thankful and humbled that the Lord chose me to be his mother. I mean, just look at this precious little man. I am so lucky. We are so blessed!
(Ok, so I should have moved the chair and him so I wasn't taking the photo INTO the sun...I had to hurry and take the photo while the clothes still looked nice and of course we were already running late for church!)
There are many things that I didn't know about parenting an adoptive child before attending the Together For Adoption conference - we were so naive! I knew that we could face things and challenges but I didn't think we'd see these things now. At age 2. Call me naive again...go ahead. It's ok. So I guess I just put it out of my mind and decided that those issues may come later. Or they may not. There was no support system in our community - no one to really ask why does our son act like that? Why does he do that? Why doesn't he like that? Why didn't he cry when we thought he should? Why did he pull away when we tried to comfort? I know we weren't educated, and I am willing to bet we probably filtered out anything that we did hear that could be considered an "issue". After all, we were adopting a baby from birth and he has been in our care since he took his first breath. He "should" be "normal", right? That's what I thought. But I was wrong. We were wrong.
The Together For Adoption conference helped me in so many ways on so many levels. I know why God had me there. He had me there not only for Passion1.27, but for us. Personally. To learn more about our own journey. If we know about our own journey, we can better help others on theirs. God was equipping me for the next season - both through the ministry and for our family. Passion1.27 IS the support system in the community that we didn't have. WE are going to help people on their journey - educate them, walk beside them, support them, help them any way we can. These children are God's chosen...and He has chosen us to parent them for him. We have to know how to help our children heal.
I learned SOOOO much from Dr. Karyn Purvis and the Monroe's through the breakout sessions at the conference. I have also read the book The Connected Child. This is a must read for every adoptive parent. You know, for any parent. The information in there is so helpful - light bulbs were going off in my head...for a second I thought I was standing in the middle of Times Square! EVERY child who is adopted has to heal. It doesn't matter when or at what age you adopted the kiddos. The levels of healing vary and depend on the circumstances of each child. Each child is different. Every child can heal. God is a God of promise. He equips and he heals.
Now we are educated. Now we know. We ask is that being 2 and a boy, or is that adoption related? We now know what to do. By God's mercy and grace, we conquered some issues...without even knowing it. But I know it now. I thank God for giving us His wisdom and His knowledge on what to do when we didn't.
So with my new knowledge and understanding of our child, I was able to connect deeper with him. To reach him in areas that have been sitting in the dark - that are now being awakened. He is and always has been a wonderful, loving, well behaved child. He's just hyperactive; does some quirky things; exhibits strange behavior at times (shoving every bit of food in his mouth that he can when he's hungry looking like he's never been fed), has some bad behavior at times; has sensory issues... We now have knowledge on WHY he may be doing those things. There were 9 months of his life that he wasn't with us. He went through things that we don't know about. He suffered during critical growth and developmental times. We are now in a really good place and I am thankful for God's wisdom and for his equipping us and for God molding Ethan and healing him.
I feel like I rambled on and nothing makes sense...I hope some of it does - my mind is flooded and I am still processing a lot of information. But I wanted to share a little bit right now. More may come later... I just drop to my knees and humbly bow before my Jesus - thanking him for his direction, his wisdom, his patience with me, his equipping me so I can help others and help all those children.
My closing thought on this scattered post is this. The deeper connection with our son is visible. He runs to my arms, smiling from ear to ear. He wants to be picked up and held tightly. When he falls and hurts himself, he cries and he wants to be comforted - he runs to us, holds on tightly and nuzzles his head into our chest. He sits on my lap to read books and out of the blue says "Ethan love mommy daddy. Mommy Daddy love Ethan." And when he kisses goodnight, he kisses and hugs as big and tight as that little boy can...and he comes back for one more kiss - grabbing your face in his hands and kissing my lips saying "night night mommy!"
My cup is full. It's overflowing with blessings. And Grace.
No comments:
Post a Comment